looking forward

1

August 13, 2013 by scratchtype1

Barefoot running has been teaching me to run tall. At least that’s what it feels like and I feel that I’ve noticed a couple of things when I’ve been running:

— I have something of a tendency to drop my head and look down. Some of that is long lifetime habit, I’ve always been a shy person and can feel uncomfortable looking at others. Some of it has been the learning process of watching where I step while going around barefoot. I’m becoming better at scanning down and looking forward after, but it’s a skill I’ve had to learn and improve upon.

— It’s easier and faster to run if your eyes are mostly looking out and forwards. It raises the chin and head, and opens the airway as well as the chest.

— The other side of that is that looking down slows you down.

I ran over 2 miles on Saturday. It was still humid some that morning, but I ran well and it felt lovely. Back in my shod-running days, I often felt like a sort of runner, mostly plodding along at a slow pace. Right now I think I’m running a somewhat faster pace and the tempo of my legs is much quicker. So while I’m probably still not a fast sort of runner, I feel faster, feel quicker, feel lighter. It’s a good feeling, it’s energizing. I love the way it makes the bottom of my feet feel and the feel-good chemicals it releases into my brain and nervous system.

I try to use those good feelings to keep me moving in other ways, not just running. I had a hard breakup a few years ago and it took me a long time and my own peculiar way to slowly piece my sense of feelings and self back again to where it finally felt like I might be ready to see about maybe finding someone that I can be comfortable with and who could be comfortable with me. On that Saturday run, I thought some about the frustration I was feeling regarding the one avenue I had begun looking into. Back in July, I signed up for OKCupid, although at first I didn’t answer all that many questions and sort of just floated around.

But after I began doing my first small initial barefoot runs, it seemed to strengthen something and so I answered more questions, began looking more carefully at some of the profiles and suggestions and then finally began writing messages to those who seemed like there could be a chance to develop some communication. Although it was a bit dismaying that after 10 days or so I had not gotten a single response, not even a thanks-but-no-thanks answer. Fair enough I guess. It’s probably different for some women on a dating site like that — they probably get a lot of messages and it could be annoying to answer every single one, especially when there is always some risk that some of those messages could be coming from creepy types. It may simply be an intelligent policy to only answer those that they feel like they would maybe eventually like to meet.

But then yesterday afternoon, I did get a response. Whether or not it’ll eventually lead to a face-to-face meetup, I don’t know, but she sounds quite interesting and I also think she’s rather beautiful. So I did my best to write an intelligent and coherent reply to her last night.

And if nothing else, at least I got one response back. So things aren’t hopeless. Never easy, but not hopeless.

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One thought on “looking forward

  1. runninginnj says:

    Good luck with the online dating. I met my wife 11 years ago through online dating so it can work. However I think it may be partly down to the approach I took – I didn’t know anyone where I was living (had just moved to the US) so I was just using it to make friends and go out to new places; she had signed up because her friend was on it and she had to review potential dates. It’s amazing we ever actually met up really but we’ve been married 8 years now. I met quite a few people – not sure where you are, but it might have been easier because it was around NYC (I met some odd people though).

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